The Lydster, Part 27: Grandparents to the Rescue


Carol and I went to a wedding on Memorial Day weekend, and we were trying to suss out what to do with Lydia. So we tried the “noble experiment”; she would stay over at Grandma and Grandpa’s house. A couple weeks before, on Mother’s Day weekend, we mentioned the possibility to her, and she headed right for their vehicle. It wasn’t staying with them we worried about, it was how she would be in the morning without either Mommy or Daddy there. It simply hadn’t happened before, though her cousins had successfully stayed with them at an earlier age.

Little did we know that, within the month, we would be sending her there again. As I’ve alluded, Lydia’s been sick, with pinkeye, then a bad cold, then an ear infection. I took care of her Friday, June 2, Monday, June 5, and Friday, June 9, plus the mornings of June 6 and 7, where Carol took care of her those afternoons. (We shared the weekend.) We thought she was well enough on the Thursday, but we were evidently wrong. Nor was she well enough on Monday, June 12. So Grandpa picked her up and brought her to his house, an hour and a quarter away. Then some combination of Grandma and Grandpa took care of her at our house Tuesday through Thursday.

She’s feeling much better now, I’m pleased to report.

While she was sick, and I was tending to her, she still could be her charming self, applauding to my singing along with whatever record that happened to be on (likely Beatles or Beach Boys).

Glad your feeling better, honey. Love from Daddy. And thanks to Grandma and Grandpa from all of us.
***
Happy first birthday, Norah!

Suicide Isn’t Painless: Three Questions

The coincidence of Lefty’s question about heaven AND an e-mail I got from a Methodist listserv I belong to generates these questions:

One person was aware of someone who was Roman Catholic who was despairing over a suicide. Another person responded:

According to the online Catechism of the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops
Under Part Three: Life in Christ Section Two: The Ten Commandments Chapter Two: “You Shall Love Your Neighbor as Yourself”
Article 5: The Fifth Commandment I. Respect for Human Life
Subsection on Suicide (Paragraphs 2280-2283) States:
2280
Everyone is responsible for his life before God who has given it to him. It is God who remains the sovereign Master of life. We are obliged to accept life gratefully and preserve it for his honor and the salvation of our souls. We are stewards, not owners, of the life God has entrusted to us. It is not ours to dispose of.
2281
Suicide contradicts the natural inclination of the human being to preserve and perpetuate his life. It is gravely contrary to the just love of self. It likewise offends love of neighbor because it unjustly breaks the ties of solidarity with family, nation, and other human societies to which we continue to have obligations. Suicide is contrary to love for the living God.
2282
If suicide is committed with the intention of setting an example, especially to the young, it also takes on the gravity of scandal. Voluntary co-operation in suicide is contrary to the moral law.

Grave psychological disturbances, anguish, or grave fear of hardship, suffering, or torture can diminish the responsibility of the one committing suicide.
2283
We should not despair of the eternal salvation of persons who have taken their own lives. By ways known to him alone, God can provide the opportunity for salutary repentance. The Church prays for persons who have taken their own lives.

Several people provided examples of a more understanding position by priests, including one who noted that the priest knew [X] and “his homily was warm and touching, indicating no hint of condemnation for suicide. I don’t know what the official teaching is on suicide in the Roman Catholic Church, but the practice appears no longer to be condemnation to hell. I have been thinking recently that I would like to investigation this transformation.”

This piece, from a more fundamentalistist approach, suggests one person who may have committed suicide but got into heaven (Saul), but generally has a gloomier take on the topic.

So, my three questions:

1. Is there a hell?
2. Who goes there?
3. Does suicide necessarily send you there?

My answers are: Possibly; it’s not my call to make; it’s not my call to make.
***
I went by a church this week and saw the sign out front that said: “Revelation: The Last Word of God”. Somehow, this really bothered me. It was as though God hasn’t had anything to say to us in 1900 years. No wonder people thought God was dead.

Roger Answers Your Questions, Gordon and Lefty (or GordonLefty)

Near-twin Gordon Says:I have a few questions:

And I have a few answers.

1) Is it true that Lefty Brown and I are the same person? (After all, you never see us in the same room together)?

Well, that depends on YOUR answer to these two questions:

1. Are you left-handed?
and
2. Have you ever worn a bra on your head?
If the answer to both questions is YES, then maybe you ARE Lefty Brown.

and

2) What’s the best thing about living in Albany, NY?

Probably the events: the Alive at Five free concerts, Pinksterfest, Larkfest, events on the Empire State Plaza.

Lefty found need to reply:

First of all…Gordon! Is this some lame attempt to claim ownership of my cd and comic book collection….’cause that can go both ways my friend!

Now questions:

One I’ve actually have been thinking about emailing you privately…
1.) The EW 25 Controversial films…have you watched Birth of a Nation? If so, what are your reactions to it? I’m trying to frame the question on the place of art versus racism. Take the Triumph of the Wills. I can appreciate the talent and artistry of R….(I forget her name)

(LENI RIEFENSTAHL)
but of course the subject and the use of film as propaganda is oft-times bone-chilling.

I’ve seen clips, of course, but not the whole thing. Like an argument I once made on behalf of Amos ‘N’ Andy, I think it SHOULD be seen, and discussed.

2.) You get one and only one Beatles album to survivor the coming Apocalypse. Which one would it be (and no fair going to either of the red or blue collections)?

Beatles Box 2. Oh, that’s probably a cheat, too. Logic would dictate #1s, because it’s far longer, but I’d probably come down in favor of Revolver over the white album (Revolution 9 seems too apocalyptic.)

3.) Resurrection. Will our lives in heaven being only as souls, or will it be in body as well? If it is bodily, which body type? Tattoos et al? The thinner or fatter me? Etc?

OK, try this on: it’s like that story in the Acts of the Apostles where everyone hears the Word in their own tongue. You would be in your best self, but other people would recognize you from whatever stage of life they knew you best.

4.) Is violence ever justified? Do you believe a violent resistance when it comes to protect your loved ones?

Yes, and yes – but only as much as absolutely necessary. That said, I think one should avoid putting oneself in that position, which is why I oppose most wars, including the Iraq war. It is almost inevitable that an Andersonville/Abu Gharib or My Lai/Haditha will result over time, I’m afraid.

5.) Do you have any favorite sports teams?

I always pull for the NY Giants, who come up to Albany for a few weeks each summer.

6.) What musician/band do you find yourself a fan of, that 10 years you would have never expected to like?

The Dixie Chicks. They ripped off their name from the Little Feat song, they’re country, all sorts of reasons for disliking them. I got their new album just this week.

7.) Why does Lefty ask so many questions?

He works in a library, which expands his mind for thought-provoking queries such as these.

That’s it, for now.

And don’t think I’ve forgotten about you, Gordon. I got my eye on you!

Assuming you’re not Gordon.
***
Oh, I’d like to think I was immune to the charms of Aaron Spelling. I seldom watched Beverly Hills 90210, Melrose Place, Hotel, Dynasty, The Colbys, T.J. Hooker, or Charmed. OK, I watched the first season of Charlie’s Angels, but didn’t everyone? And I’d see The Love Boat, when there was a guest star I wanted to see, which was more often than I’d care to admit. But I forgot that Starsky and Hutch, The Rookies, Hart to Hart, and probably a whole lot more that I realized were also his work. Aaron Spelling, who was an actor in the 1950s – I did not know that – died yesterday at 83.

Roger Answers Your Questions, Scott and Nik

Our first victim, er, contestant is Scott:

I took that test and got blue as well. Good thing I guess that my blog is already that color.

I thought to change my blog color just for the day, but changed my mind. But the blog is OBVIOUSLY green.

I really enjoy reading “Pearls Before Swine”, even if the artwork is lacking.

Yeah, though the artwork is actually growing on me. It’s better artistically than early Doonesbury, which was really minimalist, as I recall. In any case, it’s probably one of my top three strips.

Questions for Roger:

Yeah, that’s just like me, answering questions that weren’t even being asked.

1. So far, what has been your biggest-happiest-proudest moment of being Lydia’s father?

Don’t know, actually. But I can tell you what’s tickling me right now. She takes her carriage, the one she used to ride in (but won’t now unless she’s ill), which is still taller than she is, and walks it around the block, without riding off onto someone’s lawn or someone’s driveway. Just last week, I was walking behind her and the carriage and someone coming toward me though I must have had a remote control for the carriage. People seeing this from the street side seem to think it’s “AWWWW”-inducing. I think it’s amazing, since it involves six right turns (one out of the walkway, four at the corners, and one back into the walkway). She must be using her peripheral vision.

Also: she sees my change (coins), and has not indicated any interest in swallowing them. (Conversely, her father swallowed a penny once.) Instead, she brings it to me. This frustrates her mother; when SHE finds my change (on the floor, on the bed, in the laundry), she puts it in her change jar.
Recently, Carol was reading the paper, and Lydia said, “NO, Daddy’s!” (I read it a lot more than my wife does.) I thought it was very funny. Not sure my wife did.

2. It’s early yet, but who are you picking to win the World Series?

You’re a cruel man, Scott.
All right. The New York Metropolitans over the Detroit Tigers in six games.
BTW, I saw the Tigers’ leadoff hitter, Curtis Granderson, playing in Class A Oneonta three years ago.

3. What is the most controversial book you have read and what are your general thoughts about it?

I don’t know. Really. So, I went to Banned Books list and picked out four “challenged” books I’ve read.

Captain Underpants – I used to read this series with my niece who’s now 15, when she was maybe half that age. We enjoyed it tremendously.

A Handmaid’s Tale – I’m not a big novel fan, but that was the assignment for that particular month in my book club. I was surprised how much I was enraptured by this Margaret Atwood story.

Pentagon Papers – I was really ticked off with the abuses of my government.

Joy of Sex – I was 15. I don’t remember. Oh, wait, I do remember. I said, “THAT can’t be right, can it?” (It was.)

(And forgive me if questions #1 and #3 have already been asked of you in the past.)

I’m sure I’ve answered #1 before, but it’s always changing, so I never mind answering it.

And now from Nik:

Cheesy cliched questions!

I like cheese.

If you were a tree, what kind would you be?

A chestnut tree. There were chestnut trees on my walk home from school, and every year in season, I’d collect chestnuts. They’re smooth and beautiful, like fine wood. I’d keep them through the winter, to remind me that there would be new life. Then I’d toss them before they would go bad and do it again the next year. I should note that they were actually horse chestnuts, and therefore not edible.

If you could meet any person living or dead, who?

Thomas Jefferson, or Thomas Edison. Or maybe politician, inventor and regular raconteur Ben Franklin.

If you were a book, what would your title be?

I’ve ben thinking about this a lot, actually, because I signed up at The Remembering Site to write my life story. Haven’t actually WRITTEN much (started three sections), but have mused on it. In 1989, I probably would have stolen “Still Crazy After all These Years”. Now I really don’t know yet. But I’m open to suggestion/persuasion.
***
Fred Hembeck:
a) got married to Lynn Moss 27 years ago today
b) is smart enough to have mentioned same in his blog today
c) was kind enough to mention me in his post yesterday even though he was
d) the subject of my teasing last year on this date over this subject
e) is someone, along with the aforementioned Lynn Moss (and the artist currently known as Julie!) who we hope to see this summer
f) has a new outlet for his musings – this week, Beatlemania…and Al Jolson?

Yes, the answer is all of the above. Congrats, you kids!

Add Some Music to Your Day

Got some new music lately. Finally listened to it the three times required by Roger’s Rules of Listening to Music.

Paul Simon- Surprise. I found a surprising number of people online who indicated that they didn’t like the album. I’ve enjoyed it thus far, especially the first song, which was so atypical Simon, probably the Brian Eno influence, that I though I had put in the wrong album. “How can you live in the Northeast? How can you live in the South? How can you build on the banks of a river When the flood water pours from the mouth?” A conversation I’ve had with others since the flooding on the Mississippi in the last decade.

Lesley Gore – Ever Since. Gorgeous. Great reinterpretation of “You Don’t Own Me”.

George Harrison. This is an album of rarities a friend sent me. My favorite tune so far is a song that starts out with My Sweet Lord musically, but lyrically is a pirate song.

Jesse James appears in both the Mark Knofler/Emmylou Harris disc, and the Springsteen disc. I found Mark and Emmylou’s disc quite enjoyable.

The new Springsteen album, The Seeger Sessions, which I got from one of my sisters from Father’s Day, it felt like I’ve know for years. It’s like what Carole King once said about her early performances; she felt that she went on the stage “pre-loved”, because her friend James Taylor would introduce her by asking the audience, “Do you know (these songs)? This lady wrote them!” That’s how I feel about this album – loved practically before I heard a note.
Springsteen’s version of “We Shall Overcome” I had already owned from this Seeger tribute compilation that I bought in 2002 at an Old Songs festival. “Overcome” and “Eyes on the Prize” were on the Seeger “We Shall Overcome” album I’ve owned for 40 years. “Froggie Went a-Courtin’ ” and “Erie Canal” I knew from my childhood – all upstate New York children of a certain age knew “from Albany to Buffalo”. And the gospel and folk songs were also largely familiar.

Lefty made an album for Eddie, and sent me a copy, too. My enthusiasm practically matches Eddie’s.

And speaking of Eddie – it’s always about you, Eddie – he and I were the grand winners of the Blog This Pal 2nd Blogiversary Giveaway. We were also the ONLY entrants in the Blog This Pal 2nd Blogiversary Giveaway. One prize was a book called Fun with Milk and Cheese, which is…fun. Dairy products with attitude is always fun. It was one of the last things I was reading when I went cold turkey on comics back in the early 1990s, so it was great to get.
Then there was the music. Gordon starts with a Star Trek cut called which you would recognize, Amok Time. Then the Beatles’ Revolution. Then Ernie from Sesame Street singing “Rubber Duckie”? A brave man, that Gordon. My favorite track, though, is the next one, Harry Belafonte’s Mama Look A Bobo, with the line, “Shut your mout’ Go away Mama, look at bobo dey”, which I hadn’t heard since I was about four years old. It’s a dumb song, but it brought pleasant memories. There were other good songs, too.
***
Now, of COURSE it would be inappropriate to ask for you folks to burn music for me. But I DID own these, and they got lost in the office move.
One was the first disc of a 2-disc Ella Fitzgerald 75th Birthday Celebration on the Decca Jazz label.
One was the first disc of the 4-disc Steve Winwood box set.
One was the soundtrack for Toy Story 2.
Now if you happen to have any of these items, and are willing to…share, please let me know.

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