Lydia Archives - Ramblin' with Roger

Lydster: go to the South African consulate

Happy birthday!!

Last we checked, my daughter and I were getting ready to go to the South African consulate in New York City in mid-January. She was there for about 45 minutes. Her father had to stay downstairs, as did a couple of other parents, and there were no chairs; they specifically did not want us to sit on the floor.

Everything seemed to be in place, but we still fretted a bit. That evening, we went to see Maybe Happy Ending with a niece and her Significant Other, the first Broadway show I had seen since Newsies in 2014, and also with my daughter.

Shockingly, her visa arrived in a week —yay!

Jersey

On February 5th, my wife, daughter, and I went to Newark. My wife rightly hated driving in New Jersey, and the closer we got to Newark, the worse. One particular car was in the right lane of three heading south while we were in the middle lane. The car from our right decided to be in the same space we were in, so my wife had to evade the vehicle, not even having time to see if a vehicle was in the left lane to avoid this fool.

We stopped at a hotel near the Newark airport and took a shuttle to the airport a couple of hours later. The shuttle driver’s driving made my wife nervous. “Jersey drivers” is an earned epitaph.

We arrived at the airport and went through all the processing more quickly than I anticipated. My daughter sat waiting for two hours before boarding, a bit annoyed that we got there so early.

Our daughter had a 14-hour direct flight from Newark to Cape Town, South Africa, and got a ride to her college. Before beginning classes, she experienced many cool and fun orientation stuff, including sightseeing. She seems to be enjoying herself.

School days

Classes began on February 17th, and she’s enjoying dance, history, and art. One of the things she mentioned about her art class was that most of her classmates have been attending classes together for the past two years. She’s the only American there, and they’re asking her questions—”Why does your country do THAT?”—but they’re otherwise pretty chill about it.

She has had a couple of allergy scares, one while eating pizza and the other a pasta dish. Food labeling is not as robust as it is in the United States. And she’s had some difficulty with her credit and debit cards, even though we called her banks before she left the country.

Last year, my wife and I went to her college in Massachusetts and spent time with her both before and after her birthday, although not on her birthday. This year, she’s 7,845 miles or 12,625 kilometers. We knew this was going to be the case. It’s a good thing she’s doing what she wants to: exploring the world.

Yet I feel a soupçon of melancholy that she’s so far away. Happy birthday, my dear daughter. Enjoy your special day.

Lydster: Apostille

certified

Thanks to my daughter, I’ve learned a new word, apostille, which I’ll describe in due course. She decided to study abroad in the second semester of this college year. There’s a database she consulted to discern where to go based on her interests in art, black studies, environmental studies, and social justice.

She found one college in Botswana and three in South Africa: one in Johannesburg and the others in Cape Town. So she picked one, and then the process began. Because her current college compiled grades in a non-conventional way, she didn’t get approved for this process until late October. This seems like a reasonable amount of time, except that one has to get a visa to be a student in South Africa.

She made an appointment and was given January 21, 2025, to appear at the South African consulate in New York City. (One has to go to NYC, LA, or DC.) After writing a letter of appeal, the time was changed to January 14, and her February 5 flight was still a tight deadline.

The extensive list

Before the consulate visit, she had to check off items on this list. One item was a Notarized copy of the birth certificate. What does THAT mean?

Since my daughter was away at college, I went to Albany City Hall to get another copy of her birth certificate. We had the original, but I correctly surmised we’d need another one. It was a good thing I went in that direction. Once I got the birth certificate ($17), I got this page from the city clerk’s office. “Once a certified record is issued by the city of Albany, that record must go to the Albany County clerk’s office. The fee is $3 per document. The record must be issued within the last six months.” Fortunately, the city and county clerks are only a short distance apart on Eagle Street.

“The documents must then go to the New York State Secretary of State, Miscellaneous Records the country where the document is to be sent must be specified. The fee is $10 per document. ” That is at 99 Washington Avenue, not too far away.

The word at the top of the page the city clerk’s office gave me is Apostille. It is “a document used in international law that is issued by a government in accordance with the Hague Convention, and that certifies that another document has been signed by a notary public.”

Plus

She also needed a “Machine-readable valid passport with at least two (2) unused (blank) pages labeled Visa when presented at the Embassy or Consulate; one page for affixing the visa or permit by the embassy/consulate and the other page for endorsement of entry/departure stamp by the South African Immigration Services. Passport must be valid for 30 more days after the intended return date from South Africa.”

As it turned out, I had… persuaded her to get a passport in February 2024, which allowed her to dream about going abroad.

Two (2) passport photos with white or light background

She got this when she was home for Thanksgiving break. These are for the visa.

Medical report on prescribed form (physical). The certificate must not be older than six (6) months at the time the applicant submits an application.

It was also completed during the T-day break.

Original FBI certificate (full criminal background check report) and original police clearance certificate from each country where the relevant applicant resided for 12 months or longer after attaining the age of 18 years (for the last 5 years) in respect of criminal records or the character of that applicant, which certificate shall not be older than six months at the time of its submission.

Ditto. This was done in Half Moon, a small hamlet in the metro area that is not especially nearby.

What else?

Certified/notarized copy of bio page of the passport
Proof of financial means in the form of recent three months bank statements stamped by bank, and notarized letter from the parents stating the financial responsibility.
Proof of sufficient financial means available to the learner while in South Africa
Certified copy of ID of person taking financial responsibility, with three months statement and stamped letter from the bank.

Our financial institutions (banks, credit unions) handled “certified/notarized” slightly differently.

Proof of itinerary/reservation of round trip air tickets. Please do not purchase air tickets until you obtain a South African visa.

How do we prove an itinerary without buying a ticket? We purchase a (more expensive) refundable ticket.

But we HAVE insurance, don’t we?

Proof of medical cover, renewed annually, for the period of study with a medical scheme registered under the Medical Schemes Act.

This confused me somewhat, as the entity arranging the trip provided a policy through a company that “provides a complete network of travel insurance coverage—medical insurance, 24-hour emergency assistance, trip and baggage delay, loss of baggage, and much more!” However, the company was NOT registered under the Medical Schemes Act.

On January 6, I purchased a qualifying insurance policy. I had a copy of my receipt, but we didn’t have a copy of the policy. I wrote to them again on January 10th, and they sent the policy to my daughter, saying they had sent it previously. Unfortunately, it was password-protected, and we had no idea what the password was. Luckily, my daughter wrote to them again, and they gave us a clean copy we could print.

So, on Monday, January 13, my daughter and I took a train to New York City in anticipation of the trip to the South African consulate with what we HOPED was everything we needed, including a US Postal Service self-addressed, pre-paid courier envelope “to facilitate return services” and a “non-refundable fee of $36.00 money order for processing.”

More soon.

Lying about time

inaccurate

As long as I can remember, I’ve been lying about time. When I was growing up, my household, probably my father, decided that the kitchen clock should run 15 minutes ahead. This was an attempt to get us to attend church and other events on time. I think it worked for a short while, but after a bit, we knew we had an extra quarter-hour and would get to events late anyway.

Incidentally, the clock in the kitchen was the only timepiece everyone could see. My parents may have had an alarm clock in their bedroom, but I do not recall a clock in the living room.

I’ve learned to lie to some people about time. If I tell someone I must get to a train station or airport by a specific time, I suggest the train or flight is earlier. I find this to be an acceptable fabrication. Doing otherwise would make me irritated with the driver when I get to my destination with too little time. (I have specific examples.)

Including me

I lie to myself about when I have to leave for a CDTA bus. If I tell myself I must leave by 1 p.m., when I don’t need to leave until 1:05, I can return to the house and retrieve my wallet or find the house key.

When I worked at FantaCo in the 1980s, we had a great artist named Raoul Vezina. However, when he worked on a project, such as a Smilin’ Ed comic, he was such a perfectionist that he was invariably late. So Tom, the owner, would say, “Raoul, the book MUST be done by February 1!” It didn’t need to be completed until February 15, yet he’d still be putting on the finishing touches.

Sometimes, my wife tells me she’ll be home by a specific time. She is not lying, but she isn’t usually accurate. One time recently, I was supposed to start pre-heating the oven and then add the macaroni and cheese she had prepared the day before. I started the process 15 minutes late, just the right timing.

When planning a family trip in early February, the daughter suggested that we all agree to leave by 9:30 a.m., assuring that we would go by 10 a.m. We left the house at 10:08, pretty darn good.

Do YOU lie about time to yourself or others? Do others lie to you about time?

Lydster: making my life brighter

office chair

lamps My daughter has been making my life brighter for two decades, but right after Christmas, it wasn’t merely a metaphor. My wife and I had gone out to see a Saturday matinee. When we got back, she had put together three lamps for the living room that Santa had brought for me.

The front of the living room was too dark, so I couldn’t read the spines of my CDs. The last time my friends visited for a hearts game, the room was too dark for them, so this was a really important addition.

That she did it all by herself was quite remarkable. She had wanted to do this earlier, but her parents were always around, so she had to wait until we went to the movies.

Better seating

She also brought an office chair upstairs and put it together. I had one that broke down. Then, I used a stationary chair, which was more comfortable but less easy to get in and out of—the office chair swivels. Additionally, the new chair makes it much easier to clean the room. The hardest task was taking the old chair to the attic; I was not strong enough to do it myself.

During the cleaning – I picked up, and she removed stuff – we also had a wonderful conversation about life. We talked about the friends she had when she was younger. She still has some of them, and others have faded away, but she keeps track of many. We talked about our friend Bonnie, who she believes is the first significant person in her life to die. She doesn’t really remember my mother; the last time she saw her was when the daughter was five. Also, we discussed other relationships each of us have had.

We talked about the time we deconstructed the rotting shed in the backyard, one of the great joys I had working with her. It was a wonderful evening.

Lydster: Wall of boxes

miracle

When our daughter came home from college on December 20, we had a wall of boxes. The wall between the hallway and the living room was a bunch of presents we had received via UPS and the Postal Service.

The Amazon box contained a small Christmas tree we received from relatives. As you might be able to tell, the huge box contained an office chair, which, as it turned out, was for me.

The three similar boxes were packages with a bit of a story. UPS had been delivering certain deliveries to a CVS closing on Thursday, December 12th. I received a notice from UPS that the boxes had been delivered to that address on Wednesday, December 11th. So I went there, but the boxes weren’t there—hmm.

As it turned out, the boxes were delivered to the CVS in Stuyvesant Plaza. The next day, I took my cart and went to that CVS to get the three boxes much bigger than I had anticipated. They weighed about 20 kilograms apiece, but they were also bulky. Getting them home on a bus with a cart was a challenge, as only one box fit into the cart. The other two hung on the top, and it was an interesting balancing act. After I got them home, I was pretty much spent for the day.

In addition

The tall, thin box was a bed frame for our daughter’s room.

Lydia's stuff

Then, our daughter’s stuff was hanging out behind the wall of boxes. It included the things she brought home this month and some items from when she came home for Thanksgiving, so half of the living room was swallowed up.

Fortunately, she did yoeperson’s work and cleaned all this up by the evening of December 23, plus set up and decorate the tree with a friend. The big box in this picture is the same chair, and the little tree was the one in the Amazon box, also put together by our daughter.

The picture below was taken the morning of Christmas Eve. It’s not entirely tidy, but it’s considerably less chaotic than it had been only a few days before. It’s our little holiday miracle.

Christmas tree 2024