Mark Evanier Archives - Page 25 of 28

Mom: you were WAY too hard on yourself

“Hey, none of us are in jail. We didn’t end up as mass murderers, or anything. So there’s that!”

Around 1981, my mother took a cooperative extension course near her home in Charlotte, NC; I don’t even know what the topic was. What my sisters and I DO recall, though, is that it had a profound, and, from our point of view, negative impact on her.

The message she received from the class was that she was a bad mother. She worked outside the home most of the time when we were growing up. She left her children with HER mother for the bulk of the day. She wasn’t much of a cook – because her mother, who was pretty good, didn’t bother to teach her – so couldn’t share this with skill with her children.

The first time she mentioned this to me when I visited the family early in 1982, I thought she was kidding. But she brought this up time and again. In 1984, I remember spending a whole train ride from Providence, RI, where a cousin had graduated from college to New York City, where we rendezvoused with the rest of the family, trying, and failing, to convince her of her positive qualities.

After a while, my sisters and I developed some pat, and perhaps snarky responses to her ridiculous narrative:
“Mom, we all turned out fine, so you must have done SOMETHING right!”
“You were not around all the time, so we appreciated you when you WERE there.”
“Hey, none of us are in jail. We didn’t end up as mass murderers, or anything. So there’s that!”

This litany of hers went on, off and on, for perhaps a decade and a half; I specifically remember addressing this topic as late as 1996, because I probably said something such, “You have to stop beating yourself up over this! We’re not unhappy with you, but we’re sad that you’re so unhappy.” This wasn’t the first time my sisters and I had said that, but I don’t recall her launching into this particular diatribe, at least with me, again.

Still, I’m pained that she could be so susceptible, for so long, to someone else’s script. I knew that she could be emotionally squeezed by her mother and her husband at times. Still, this (bogus) message from a stranger really stifled her self-confidence at times.

As I remember my mom, two years after she died, I wish she could have listened more to her own voice.
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Mark Evanier, his mother, her ophthalmologist, and a certain cartoon character, which is a fun story.

All Hallows Eve 2012

The Daughter will go out tonight, but because of her peanut allergy, she generally gets to keep less than 50% of her haul; her mother gets the rest.

For all my lifetime, through 2006, the end of Daylight Saving Time in most of the United States was on the last Sunday in October. But thanks to the powerful candy lobby, which wants children to be able to trick or treat on Halloween with more daylight, and its ally, the dentist lobby, which wants children to rot their teeth, it’s been pushed back to the first Monday in November. It’s this time of year that always confuses me in terms of what time it in other countries, since the start and end of DST/British Summer Time does not happen simultaneously. Go to this site to see what time it is around the world.

Glad to see that Mark Evanier has ended his war on candy corn.; well, almost. He still doesn’t like it, but as long as he doesn’t have to eat it, he doesn’t care if you do. I happen to like it, in moderation. Can’t seem to find a decent video of I Don’t Like Candy Corn by Moose and Zee from Nick Jr., which I remember watching with my daughter a few years back.

The Daughter will go out tonight, but because of her peanut allergy, she generally gets to keep less than 50% of her haul; her mother gets the rest. She’s going as a soccer player, BTW, which is a bit of a cheat since she IS.

Here’s something I may not have mentioned; I don’t particularly like peanut butter. Actually, that’s not true – I HATE peanut butter. Odd thing is that I loved it as a kid, specifically Jif. I remember eating it when I was three or four. I think I must have had too much at some point because now the smell makes me nauseous, and the taste is intolerable. I’m not allergic; I can eat peanuts, though I don’t love them.

I’ve dressed up for Halloween as an adult, but not for at least a decade.

Having never seen a movie from the Halloween movie series, I’m not planning to start now. Yet I know more about the series than I care to because FantaCo, where I worked in the 1980s, sold a number of Michael Myers masks, and other items of interest. But my buddy Steve Bissette revisits the film, and also reviews 2016: OBAMA’S AMERICA (2012).

Go search SamuraiFrog’s blog for Halloween goodness. Then, courtesy of Jaquandor, listen to spooky music – if you dare!

The Library of Congress: The Fantasy and Folklore of All Hallows
The Food and Drug Administration: Halloween Food Safety Tips for Parents
The Census Bureau: Facts for Features: Halloween

October Rambling: Name That Tune

Me, uncharacteristically, if not ahead of the curve, at least with it.

Briticisms in American English.

Black and White Vernacular in American Sign Language.

Give this man a Silver Star; a future President got one.

I want to tell you something about the future. “It will either be: A mind-bendingly awesome; utopian landscape where all of Earth’s problems have been resolved and technology and humanity have evolved to create harmony. Or it might be a f@#$ed-up dystopian nightmare.” Gotta say that I’ve tired of the latter portrayal, but these movie clips are still interesting.

Erich Von Stroheim Radio Broadcast (1948) Talks about the Death of D.W. GRIFFITH, the early and controversial filmmaker.

Why film critic Roger Ebert won’t stick to his knitting, talking about (GASP!) politics when he “should” be limiting himself to movie reviews.

Sad that Alex Karras died. Followed him as an All-Pro defensive tackle for the Detroit Lions, on “Monday Night Football”, and as an actor in the movie Blazing Saddles.

Being hit on by a swinger couple. Actually, a lovely piece by Ken Levine on the phenomenon of storytelling. He also wrote a lovely tribute to the late NBC exec Brandon Tartikoff, which also explains why so much of today’s TV is lousy.

What IS the name of that mysterious music? YOU’VE heard it – it’s the thing playing HERE and HERE and even HERE. I’ve finally discovered from various sources that it’s called Mysterioso Pizzicato, a/k/a Here comes the villain. It was first published in the ‘Remick Folio of Moving Picture Music, vol. I,’ in 1914, compiled and edited by one J. Bodewalt Lampe, who may (or may not) have written it. The tune was used as background to scary scenes in silent movies.

The Beethoven Mystery: Why haven’t we figured out his Ninth Symphony yet?

“Perfessor” Bill Edward: Professional Purveyor of Pianistic Pyrotechnics.

The website for CBS Television City in Hollywood; fascinating history, which you can also see in this video.

Mark Evanier’s mother died at the age of 90. “Someone… might think, ‘Hey, smoking can’t be that bad if Mark’s mother smoked 75 years and made it to age 90.’ Yeah, but for about the last fifteen, she could barely walk and barely see.” He’s been writing a series called Tales of My Mother. The fourth one, about her and the TV show LA Law and Jimmy Smits, is a particular hoot, but they are all worth reading.

Glenn Fleishman describes what it’s like to be on the game show Jeopardy! Here are Jeopardy’s most memorable moments, including what happens if a certain person says something.

Ray Bradbury matches wits with Groucho Marx.

Charles Darwin And The Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day.

Every Infomercial Ever.

Matching birthday probabilities and Johnny Carson.

Let’s look at the rise of Gangham Style and how media events and social networks can trigger massive sharing. I noticed that I blogged about it on August 15, which put me, uncharacteristically, if not ahead of the curve, at least with it. Then, of course, I find some real life Simpsons opening from June, and I realize, nope, still behind the curve.

Chuck Miller explains why 45s have big holes in the center, while vinyl albums have small holes.

The Marshmallow Test.

25 Foods You’ll Never Be Able To Eat Again. I never had most of these, though I did try Apple Newtons a few times.

Jaquandor writes about the superhero cat named Little Bootie; oh, and technology. Also, a pie to the face; no, I don’t quite understand, but it seems to make him SO happy.

FROM MY OTHER BLOGS

Robots shut down live broadcast of scfi award ceremony.

An unwitting participant in an international travesty.

RFID; the F does NOT mean freedom, or foolproof. This one got excerpted in the newspaper.

What if the technology went away?

Scanning whole books is fair use?

Obviously, we WERE a Christian nation. Ask a Native American.

GOOGLE ALERTS

In his attempt to compose a soundtrack to a novel — Lair Hunt’s The Impossibly — Roger Green, with the help of Mark Harris on saxophone and bass clarinet…

Roger Green and Associates, Inc.
Attribute importance is a key information need for marketers. An understanding of attribute importance can help explain physician prescribing, it can help identify …

Living on Anbesol and Advil

The music group called Big Daddy (loved by many, including me) is staging a Kickstarter campaign to raise $35,000 to produce their new album.

As mentioned, I had a root canal a couple of weeks ago, and the pain was far less than the last one I had some 15 years ago. But then I had to have some work done on another tooth, and the mouth discomfort after that one was mighty steady; not a sharp pain, but a constant ache, for which I was surviving on certain medicines.

And it was not great timing. Last weekend, the daughter didn’t have soccer, but the Wife and I did have a wedding to go to, a co-worker of hers who I didn’t know to a guy I knew just as well. The service was at 2 pm in Niskayuna, in neighboring Schenectady County, and it was lovely. The reception wasn’t until 5 pm, in Altamont, in Albany County, a 30-minute drive, so we did what we needed to do; we went grocery shopping. Talk about being overdressed for an activity.

The reception was at a place called the Appel Inn; our friends Marc and Janna had their reception there in November of 1999. We sat with one of the bride’s and my wife’s teaching colleagues, and her husband, neither of which I knew, but they were a delightful couple. But somewhere during this, the throbbing returned and having no over-the-counter solutions, I tried Southern Comfort and 7-Up; singularly unhelpful.

After church on Sunday, we drove to Schenectady to meet my sister Leslie’s bus. She had flown from San Diego, CA to Charlotte, NC back in late September to go to a conference, and visit our sister and niece; then flew to New York City, and visited relatives and a friend; then took a bus to Binghamton, NY to do genealogical research and to attend her high school reunion; and finally to Schenectady.

We are at some downtown restaurant called Bombers, and I saw that the New York Giants football team (my team) was already down 14-0, after only five minutes in the game; sigh. They ended up winning 41-27. But I didn’t see it.

We went to see the 2 pm stage performance of Mary Poppins at the Proctors Theatre, and it was quite good. Perhaps a little long, with too much of the exposition done to the tune of “Chim Chim Cher-ee,” but there were so many WOW moments – the transformation of the park, Bert walking on the ceiling – that we were all impressed. By the time we got back to Albany, though, I was exhausted from pain and went to bed before anyone.

The Sister returned to San Diego on Tuesday, the pain has subsided somewhat, and we’re back to a busy schedule, mostly driven by the Daughter’s activities. Especially on the weekend.
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Jaquandor saw Mary Poppins in Buffalo two years ago.

Says Mark Evanier (and I fully agree): The music group called Big Daddy (loved by many, including me) is staging a Kickstarter campaign to raise $35,000 to produce their new album. I would like to see them do this and have already backed…but it doesn’t look good. With only two days to go, they are a little over halfway there.

Six Songs of Me

I have been of the opinion that almost any song could be done in chicken.

Dustbury did NOT insist I do this, so naturally, I did:

What was the first song you ever bought?

As I’ve noted, I belonged to the Capitol Record Club in 1965, where I was buying albums, so I’m hard pressed to figure out the first single. It may have been Eleanor Rigby/Yellow Submarine; I was then depressed by the release of the Revolver album a short time later, yet puzzled by the variation between the single version and the album version of Yellow Sub, as I noted recently. But the more I think about it, my first single was probably Soul And Inspiration by the Righteous Brothers (listen), which came out a few months earlier in 1966, as I remember that blue Verve label.

What song always gets you dancing?

Cliche that it might be, but it’s Celebration by Kool and the Gang (listen). A short-lived romance got me dragged to a local disco a few times in the day. Recently bought a greatest hits album by that group.

What song takes you back to your childhood?

As Dustbury wrote, “There are those who would argue that I never left.” That said, I’ll pick another song from my father’s singles collection, Bird Dog by the Everly Brothers (listen), on Cadence Records. I discovered that women should be referred to as poultry (quail, chick) – something I fortunately unlearned quickly; and that men were canines – is that still true?

What is your perfect love song?

Forever I have been a sucker for I Only Have Eyes for You by the Flamingoes (listen). Always makes me a bit misty.

What song would you want at your funeral?

I have been, for a long time, of the opinion that almost any song could be done in chicken. Bold songs, such as the 1812 Overture or the Ode to Joy from Beethoven’s 9th Symphony are particularly great. But the first song I heard which stimulated this proposition was In the Mood by Henhouse Five Plus Two (listen), the “group” actually being singer Ray Stevens. I first heard it on one of those Warner Brothers Loss leaders of the 1970s.

Time for an encore. One last song that makes you, you.

At bare minimum, the chorus of Don’t let me be misunderstood by The Animals (listen). “I’m just a soul whose intentions are good.” I think many of us feel that others don’t “get” us, and I certainly am not immune.
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Both Mark Evanier and Dustbury are supporting the Kickstarter effort for Big Daddy’s Smashing Songs of Stage and Screen. I third that emotion.